I am the master of my thoughts.

I have just finished reading two wonderful books: Infinite Possibilities, and The Secret, by Mike Dooley and Rhonda Byrne respectively.

They have changed my life and it has only been a couple of weeks, but I've learned and believe that my thoughts create my reality. It makes so much sense and I know my thoughts are changing because even my dreams are changing and reflecting the positivism of what I have been reading.

If you haven't had the occasion to read either of these books. I would suggest doing so because they truly are excellent, logical, and life altering.

I'm a public speaker, performer, teacher and living life to create joy and to help others. Presently, I am working in a position that I know is teaching me something. I also know that it is a temporary position. I am grateful that I have it and am looking forward to the next step in my journey.

working a job just to have health care seems pointless to me

The only reason I am working where I am working is to maintain my health insurance! Isn't that rather ridiculous? I would love to travel, to write about and critique restaurants and hotels. I would love to work on a farm or with animals. The only reason I didn't move to Europe with my back pack straight out of college was because I am a type 1 diabetic. I don't have any complications because of it and really am not unhealthy. The only thing wrong with me is that I am a diabetic. (but that's huge) I can't afford to be without insulin or health care. I need some cash for medicines and supplies for insulin pump delivery (which is costly).

I am a French teacher and about 12 years ago, I paid off all of my bills, resigned my teaching position, sold a lot of the material possessions that I had, got some student loans and enrolled in grad school which allowed me to live in France. I tried to find a job while there, but had no papers and couldn't stay. I had a couple of offers for a white marriage, but was afraid of getting caught and deported! Besides, my school told me that I had to finish my degree now or never. I figured it was only 9 more months and then I could return. . . sigh. . .

That didn't happen. After searching the world over for a job (having an MA in French and a teaching license and other supervisory and health care experience) I found a teaching position in Cincinnati! HA.

Well, I am employed, I have an old house that is kind of falling apart, two lovely pups, and a partner with a schedule that rarely allows me to see him. I am in fact, rather - happy? Except, that damned job, no wait career. I'd like to leave it! I hate being disrespected daily. I hate working my tail off to inspire a lot of people who don't seem to want to be inspired. I do love the performance aspect of teaching and creating plans. It seems though that only every other day is a good day. That is only 50%. Life is too short to enjoy only half of it. 

I need to make a change. I am not, however, exactly sure how to do that. I have left positions before without other positions, but I am wondering if I can afford to do that again. I certainly am not independently wealthy and really need help to pay for the pump supplies. Trying desperately to come up with another plan. Any suggestions?

© 2013

What is Wrong with you?

You wake up every day. The view looks the same, with those curtains or those shades and the light peeking in around the edges. You glance at the clock – two more minutes – plenty of time to go back to sleep and dream. Can you do it? Yes you can. You desperately close your eyes and imagine that last dream you were having. You focus, you try not to notice that urge to scratch your ankle. AWWW too late, scratch. You glance at the clock again. It still says two minutes and then as you close your eyes – it changes – only one minute until the alarm goes off. You try again, a little more frantically, to force yourself into a coma. MEEP MEEP MEEP MEEP MEEP, you hit the snooze – 9 more minutes. . .

You drift off to sleep and you are in the same or nearly the same dream as before you awoke. You have a sense of fulfillment. You are happy. You are physically calm and centered. You may have even been having some of the best sex of your life – Your dream life. And then it happens again. MEEP MEEP MEEP MEEP. You slam your hand down on the snooze and be it this time or three snoozes later. You haul your carcass out of the bed. You curse yourself for not going to bed earlier, even though you went to bed at 9:00 and have had a full 8 hours. You feel exhausted. You stumble to the bathroom, dreading the thought of going in today. You think of how you feel and if you are sick enough to stay home. You know you won’t. I mean, you haven’t called off in over 5 years. You are the epitome of the perfect employee. You go above and beyond. You even actually like your job, once you get there. However, for some reason getting there is becoming more and more difficult every day.

Sound familiar?

What is wrong with you? What is wrong with me? What is wrong with us? Why are we living as if this is all there is? You are miserable and you have no reason to be miserable. You love your spouse, your partner, your significant other. You try to blame them for your misery, but they are there for you! Your house is great, dirty, but great. Your pets, your kids, your family love you. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU? 

© 2013

Here to question, to inspire, to wonder, and to dream, and more importantly to make those dreams come true.

Have you ever watched a loved one . . . depart this world? Watching them leave forces you to look at them differently. It allows you to forgive them. It also changes you. It makes you look at your own life and the lives of those around you with a little more care and a little more concern.

I am no longer satisfied with the status quo of what my life has become. I want more and I want it now. Do you feel the same way?

How do we accomplish and achieve our dreams?

One of the best books I've read on the subject is "Finding Your Own North Star" by Martha Beck and of course "The Road Less Traveled" by M. Scott Peck, M.D.

What about you? Have you read any wonderful books on the subject of achieving your dreams?

© 2013